I Am Alive.

Quick update for anyone fearing that this blog is dead or dying:

It isn't.

The past two months have consisted of more work than I care to enumerate at present, grad school kicking the shit out of me, me kicking the shit out of grad school, working with charming (but very tiring) kindergarteners, personal issues, bad decisions, worse behavior, and generally shitty times, culminating in the death of a cherished family member yesterday evening.

In between all that stuff, I've tried to salvage what little I can of my artistic passions, and put things to good use. The only relatively novel thing worth reporting on is that I began experimenting with digital painting. It's an interesting medium and I want to explore it further. My first ever attempt at digital painting is below, in a piece entitled "Study 1 - Saiyu: Disgraced Runway Model." It's messy, but I had a good time bringing it to life and hope to try more pieces in this style soon. By the way -- yes, believe it or not, Gun is still in production.




In short, November has not been fun. Here's hoping December will be better. Bye.

- Fred

Ready. Set. Create.

Hallo wunderbare Kinder,

In case you missed the headlines -- Heretik Studios is back in New York City... and only New York City. I'm about to embark on the next chapter of my life here, beginning graduate school at NYU. Life shall be chaotic, intense, and harrowing... but at least it won't be boring.

As I've been preparing for the next stage, I've produced some funky updates for Gun the Animated Series. Yes, yes, I know... Episode 2, it's still not out. Although, admittedly, some of the updates are indeed the flesh and blood of Episode 2.

I'm trying to get a steady pace going in this masochistic race I'm running. In just two weeks time, I'll be setting foot through the doors of graduate study and setting my social life and free time sail in the ocean on a dinky, tattered, makeshift raft to be rescued at some point. God only knows when that will be. I'm planning to push myself to even greater heights, make even bigger sacrifices, all in the pursuit of something higher than I've ever touched before. Included among these efforts will be the steady push to improve and complete the one bit of personal work that I've treated with any seriousness in recent times. You all know what that is (yes, of course I mean my art, and more specifically Gun).

I should also mention that my friend, frequent victim of my insults, and fellow artist Ramon Rodriguez has been working at producing a new t-shirt piece at Threadless. Click here to check it out, and be sure to cast your votes!

In waiting, I'm currently contemplating the release of some crazy, ancient, hilarious, interesting goodies from way, way behind the scenes of Gun. By contemplating, of course I mean planning.

Stay tuned for that and much, much more. Auf Wiedersehen.

- Fred

A sip of the latest visuals are below, amigos.

Transitions and Tribulations

Happy July -whatever-day-it-is-today,

I have one more week.

In that time I will tape up the remains of my life here at Yale inside of dusty, used cardboard boxes addressed to other people for other purposes. I will take my earthly possessions and toss them haphazardly into the back of a van that has seen untold locations and carried an untold number of unknown people. Then I will pile these things against the walls I remember so well and hours later, I will step back into this setting that I've grown accustomed to for the past 14 months, as a visitor as opposed to an inhabitant.

I will say some of the hardest goodbyes I've said in a great while. It will not be easy. Life has a funny way of making things beautifully fucked up sometimes. I won't get into it, but suffice it to say, I'll be doing the one thing I never imagined doing when I got here - I'll be leaving something behind when I turn my back on Yale.

This all means that in 6 weeks, I'll be starting up a brand new leg of the race, namely graduate school. I'll be back home where things make sense and people I care about surround me. It should be good.

This means that during those 6 weeks, I can take a bit of time away from the stresses I've become acclimated to over the past year-and-then-some to boost my productivity, and in the process try to ignore or work through the things that have made the past two months so difficult for me on the personal side of things.

I have no idea how things will turn out, but I'm confident that when I know, you will too.

Preparatory

Hi.

Just a quick update -

I'm still working like a beast. Nothing new there. Going manic. Life has been beyond crazy the past few weeks. I'll refrain from commenting on it all. Suffice it to say major things have occurred and I'm handling it all the only way I know how. Major things will occur in the coming weeks too. I'm preparing to say goodbye. It will be surprisingly harder than I originally imagined, despite the generally awful ongoings of the past year.

Anyway, this post basically is an insubstantial update, letting you know I'm alive for now, and doing what I can with what I have at my disposal. We'll see where this road leads.

- Fred

Mile Markers

Greetings from the Front lines,

It's been an interesting week. Or maybe an uninteresting week, depending on how you look at it. I've been slowly disseminating the news that my life is going to change drastically in the next few months. Different people are taking it in different ways. I won't bother spreading the news here, because this is all about my work, not about my daily goings-on. At any rate, I've decided to step back and take some perspective. I've been finding it exceedingly difficult to achieve the things I want to achieve lately. I'm not sure where the root of this problem lies, but I know that if I stop running at 150mph and slow down for awhile, I'm more likely to spot it and find a solution.

In keeping with such a motive, I've sequestered myself again, in a manner of speaking. Limiting my contact with the outside world to necessities only, slavishly hewing away at this monstrously ambitious project of mine, trying to make my dreams come alive.

All I can do in the meantime is continue to report on my baby steps until they lead me tiptoeing across the finish line, and occasionally publish little tidbits worth staring at. More on that later.

Oh and the reason I call this post "Mile Markers"....

Today marks three years since the official release of Gun to the public. Here's to milking the successes of one episode for far too long.

... and here's to getting through what lies ahead. Drink up.

VIEW GUN EPISODE 1 ON NEWGROUNDS HERE (part 1)

- Fred

I won't explain anything here. It's incomplete, but it's just more of what you're not getting yet. Just look and enjoy.
NOTE: shot features art by Ramon Rodriguez. Click here to visit his website.

(click to view at full size)

Labbing.

Not just in a manner of speaking. I'm in the midst of hardcore, knuckle-down creative work. Yes, on Gun episode 2. I'm trying my best to see this through... no weekend trip, no work, just me and the tools of my trade.

I've sacrificed a fun, relaxing, and much-needed weekend at home to instead stay here in Shitsville and convert my 9-5 space into the makeshift Heretik Studios production floor. As I said before, I'm determined to shut myself up in this space regularly until significant strides are made. It seems to be the only way I can realistically achieve progress in my own life anymore.

Reflecting on it, I'm not too proud of it, nor am I at all pleased with it... but I have to do what I have to do.

Spin the wheels. Back to work.

- Fred...

Excess, Recess, Loss, and Gain.

I have been away from Flash for far too long.
I have been working far too hard.
I have been drinking far too much.
I have been taking far too many pills.
I have been eating far too little.
I have been thinking far too frequently.

The reality of this morning hasn't hit me yet. I don't know when it will. But I know that it will at some point, and I'm just hoping I don't fly off the deep end as a result.

Just when I thought all this wasn't enough, next week at Yale is going to be an absolute shit show. Ridiculous commutes and undoubtedly stressful days at work. Entertaining visitors from across the pond. Trying to maintain a balance between productivity and insanity, all while doing my best Lucille Ball impression, so to speak.

So what have I gained as a result?

Other than a few new pieces of art and the opportunity to work on a few more... nothing. No site updates. No follow through. Nothing.

What's left?

That, I have yet to see.